Something’s changed with my girlfriend. I was saying in my last post three days ago that she said our relationship wasn’t working and that it’s because I’m disinterested in her. Well, I haven’t done anything different since we had that conversation because I’m waiting to surprise her with the plant seeds I’ve bought, but she’s acting differently. She’s acting as if nothing is wrong with our relationship after all, which makes no sense given how upset she was.
I’m trying to figure out what changed. I checked the notifications about the seeds and they haven’t arrived yet, and I didn’t end up buying her a bouquet of the best hybrid tea roses like I was going to. I ended up doubting myself too much to send her roses out of the blue. It felt like everything I was doing at the time was wrong, so I didn’t want to buy the wrong roses and stuff up our relationship even more.
The only thing I can think of is that she either saw the receipt for the seeds I bought, which would be extremely difficult seeing as it’s been in my wallet the whole time, or she’s read my blog. If she has read my blog I’ll feel so betrayed. She knows better than anyone that this blog is private, so for her to go on my phone when I’m not looking would be a massive betrayal. I know I might be working myself up over nothing, but I have a feeling that this is what’s happened.
I guess I’ll find out whether or not she’s read my blog pretty soon. If she’s read one then she’ll read others, and she’ll be pretty upset reading this post. If her whole mood changes then she’s going to have to put her present, the climbing roses, up for sale. They’ll remind her too much of me which will hurt when I’ve broken up with her for breaking my trust.
I feel bad how much the tables may have turned.